How to advise your mother when she asks you what to wear at your wedding
“I love my mother!
In so many ways she has blessed my life. The untold hours of loving service to help me to this point in my life.
And now I am formalising the start of my own family.
Today mom called, and asked what color do I want her to wear at the wedding. It struck me how time has changed things. I remember my favourite dress, the one she bought me back in grade 2. I loved that dress.
What do I tell her? This wonderful person that has been a part of my life every step of the way. Do I tell her dark green which is the theme color for my wedding? Do I tell her to wear something pastel which I know will look good on her?
THE BURDEN OF WHAT TO WEAR
There are so many emotions that a mother feels when her daughter gets married.
It is a time for celebrating progress. It is a time to look back and remember that sweet little face that came into her life. It’s a time to say goodbye and hello to a new dynamic. It’s a time for change. It’s a time to look forward to what maybe.
As all these emotions wash around a mother wants to be there and support and do it just right.
Being dressed just right for this momentous occasion in her life can cause some real anxiety. How does she get it perfect and look just the part?
THE DRESSING FORMULAS
The secret formula is that the mother of the bride should aim to “Look like an elevated version of herself”. Not to be something that she is not. The more comfortable the more radiant. The more fun and energy will be had.
Achieving elevation uses the +1 rule. The first question is to ask what would a guest dress like. Then +1 whatever a guest would be wearing. This +1 allows the mother of the bride to stand out but not overshadow the bride.
+2 or +3 with huge makeup and hair can be uncomfortable if the person is not used to presenting in this way.
Creating this stylish, elevated look comes when the mother of the bride considers her own style and best colours. Fitting in with the wedding theme may result in wearing colours that jar with her skin tone and can make a her look like the extra aunty that photo bombed.
Everyone’s colouring has a spectrum of colours to choose from.
Step 1: Identify the right style, and it does not have to be a dress to look elegant and vibrant
Step 2: Choose from the colours that work well with the mother of the brides skin tone
Step 3: Check to see that the chosen colour harmonises or compliments the weddings theme colour. If the colour does not there are other colours that will both work with the mother of the bride and the theme colour. If there are absolutely no colours that work for both go with step 2 as the primary driver.
CAPTURED ON FILM
It is wonderful to look back and remember years later that momentous day. The fun and laughter captured on video and film will be there long after everyone has partied through the night and gone to work the next morning.
How a person comes across in photos is reflective of how comfortable they are. When the mother of the bride feels comfortable being dressed a little better than most but not stealing the limelight it is then that she will be at her most enchanting and graceful.
Allowing the mother of the bride to be herself, but just a little bit more stylish is the perfect outcome for a wonderful wedding.